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Whose Problem is it Anyway?
By Dr. Marvin Berkowitz
One of the things that make writing this column easy is the
fact that I make so many mistakes. I simply list all the
errors I make as a parent, then turn them around and offer
advice to my column readers. Now, please don’t tell my
friends I said that, because I have most of them fooled into
believing I’m perfect. I think.
When we have a problem in our home, I usually slip into my
know-it-all, problem-solver mode and offer the solution. And
that’s not always a good thing to do, as I’ll explain here.
Because of my educational background and training, schools
frequently engage me as a consultant for the purpose of
developing a program to foster students’ character
development. From time to time, I notice that school staff
members make the same mistake I do of rushing forward with a
solution rather than allowing their students to give it a
try.
A teacher recently told me that her second grade boys were
stuffing paper towels in the urinals, causing the bathroom
to flood. She had tried implementing arious rules (such as
only one boy in the bathroom at a time) but nothing seemed
to work.
I told her that perhaps it wasn’t her responsibility to
solve the problem; instead, maybe she should think of it as
a problem that belonged to the students. I suggested she ask
them to come up with a solution. And she did just that.
Much to her surprise, the students came back with something
that worked. They decided to elect respected, responsible
peers to serve as bathroom monitors. And sure enough, after
40 days and 40 nights of constant floods, the bathroom
waters subsided.
Was it a miracle? Not really…
Schools often experience problems concerning bathrooms,
recess, cafeterias, transportation, and so forth. Generally
speaking, administrators assume they “own” all problems so
they attempt to come up with solutions. But sometimes, their
solutions don’t work. I suggest that in certain
circumstances, school administrators redefine the issue of
problem ownership, asking the students for help in finding
the solutions.
This is not only a matter of efficiency in problem solving.
It’s also a matter of character development. Shared
authority promotes growth of responsibility and problem
solving skills. It also builds relationships and a sense of
the whole (the school and the classroom). And it helps our
children prepare for their eventual roles as adults in a
democratic society.
The concept can be utilized by families also. When a family
problem arises, the parents need not rush in and claim
ownership. What is this great desire to own problems anyway?
I would much rather own something nice. Wouldn’t you?
Instead, share ownership of problems. Assign to your kids,
the responsibility for finding a workable solution. They’ll
be pleased that you considered them to be so capable and
they’ll be far more likely to adhere to the solution because
it was their own.
After all, responsibility breeds even greater
responsibility. And responsibility is a core aspect of good
character.
